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Ochef Deals with Self-Esteem Issues

 Dear Martha:

My question is: Why in the name of h#&& was the format of your TV show changed? The old show was absolutely great. I loved the fact that the Turkey Hill place was the background. There was a greater diversity in the topics that were explored. I always felt like I came away having more information than when I started. I really do not like the new "studio format" show. I don't like the audience to be pandered to. Please consider going back to the old Turkey Hill format. Thank you for all the previous years of good information presented in an entertaining manner. Cheers, G.D.

 Dear G.D.:

Who in the h#&&do you think we are? We are not Martha Stewart.

We are like the tiniest crater on the dark side of the moon that is Martha Stewart. We are like the smallest grain of sand in the profound darkness at the bottom of the Marianas Trench that is Martha Stewart. We are the crustiest little snowflake a third of the way up the Mount Everest that is Martha Stewart.

No, no! We are like the teensiest-little Who that Horton heard on the tiny speck of dust in Horton Hears a Who to the whole world that is Martha Stewart.

We have not a whisper of influence in how Martha Stewart runs her mighty, successful television program, her magazines, her Web site, her radio show, her syndicated newspaper column, or any of the rest of her media empire.

SHE DOESN'T KNOW WE EXIST!

But thank you for confusing us – it made our day. (We look forward to the distant event when someone confuses us with Oprah! But perhaps that's setting our sights a little high….)

 

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