Orange roughy is a New Zealand fish with a firm white flesh, mild flavor, and is low in fat. It also goes by the attractive name of slimehead. If you can’t find specific recipes for orange roughy, look for recipes that call for snapper, grouper, or any other firm white fish, as they are similar to the roughy and can be prepared in the same way.

One of our dear readers wants to share with you her brand-specific, measurement-unspecific recipe for preparing orange roughy: She uses a rolling pin to crush Keebler Club Crakers in a plastic bag, and adds Mrs. Dash Lemon Pepper, McCormick’s Montreal Chicken Seasoning, and Lawry’s Seasoned Salt to the crackers. Separately, she whisks together two to three eggs and about 3 to 4 tablespoons of milk, and puts the fish in the egg and milk mixture to soak for about five minutes. Then she dips the fish into the cracker mixture to coat and fries them in olive oil. In her words, “This is great.”

We do get daily emails, of course, condemning us to eternal damnation for telling people how they might prepare orange roughy. To save us from such a fate, perhaps you would like to actually purchase snapper, grouper, or another firm white fish in the future and let the orange roughy frolic and multiply unmolested in the waters off New Zealand.